Therapy For Psychologists: Dos And Don’ts In And Out Of The Consulting Room

Psychologists provide and follow therapy. Therapy for psychologists is one of the most repeated and recommended recommendations within this profession, since the one who “treats, must also be treated”.

Therapy has tremendous value because another professional gives you tools that you don’t know how to use or don’t have at the time. Obviously, the goal of this article is not to give personalized treatment, but to invite psychologists to undergo therapy to talk about some of the issues that will be reflected in this article.

Therapy for psychologists is necessary for what happens during consultations, but also outside. Here are some basic questions that we should not allow neither our patient nor a stranger in reference to our figure of psychologist.

Therapy for psychologists: what you should not allow outside the consultation room

One of the heaviest burdens a professional psychologist has to bear is listening to assessments of their behavior. The psychologist is a professional who provides therapy. He or she is not the standard bearer of good behavior, either outside or inside the office. There are three simple reasons for this:

• The psychologist works only in consultation. Just as a computer scientist is not going to fix computers, for example, if he is on vacation, the psychologist gives up his role of psychologist when he leaves his job. This is the most basic thing to understand.
  • However, outside of his work, the psychologist can receive advice or recommendations, but this is not his obligation.

• There is not, and never will be, a “standard of conduct” for the psychologist in his private life. His assessments of how people should behave are subjective, as are his assessments of how a psychologist should behave outside of therapy.
  • If there is one thing therapy specifically seeks, it is for people to be able to live their lives as they wish. And there is no one way to do it, neither for patients nor for psychologists.
• The psychologist does not have above-average psychological health, just as a doctor does not have superior strength because he is a doctor. Psychologists live just like the rest of mortals.
  • However, they do have a scientific background in behavior analysis. They can assess, quantify and predict the behaviors of others in consultation and with the right data, not guesses.
• The psychologist’s “inner world” is not more intense just because he is a psychologist. The psychologist does not continually analyze himself or others. He will simply be able to comment on some questions with more professional knowledge if asked.

All of these points, while obvious, should be taken into account by psychologists when setting their own limits outside of therapy. However, it can become exhausting in some environments. It is better to raise awareness about greater respect for mental health workers.

What you should not allow during the consultation

For a psychologist, the care of the therapeutic bond with a patient is something fundamental. It has been shown that the relationship between a therapist and his patient can be as transformative as the best psychological technique.

This is why the therapist must take care of the relationship with his patient and know how to redefine certain words and attitudes. With this in mind, therapy and patient improvement can never come from questioning or attacking the therapist. There are some aspects of therapy that should never happen and still do:

• The patient tries to direct the therapy, telling him what tests and techniques he needs, because of something he has “studied” or “read before”. The two perspectives on how to approach therapy may coincide, but it is only the therapist who will implement the tests, sessions or techniques.

• The patient must not at any time question the privacy of the therapist. The patient may know something about the therapist’s personal life and feel entitled to use it in therapy if they are unwell.
  • For example, in couple therapy, the marital status of the psychologist is absolutely irrelevant, either for good or for bad. Crossing this line is a red zone, and the psychologist will have to consider whether the therapeutic relationship is broken.
• Psychologists sometimes make the mistake of being too empathetic towards the patient and exposing their experiences as a mirror of what is happening to the patient. However, it is advisable to have recourse to metaphors and exercises, personal revelations being to be avoided in the course of the therapy. This would be a limit that the psychologist must impose on himself.
• The professional relationship must be supervised and marked. The psychologist should be a guide for the patient, not a friend. If the calls or messages occur outside of therapy, the psychologist should re-explain to the patient the dynamics of their relationship.
  • There are therapies in which there is follow-up with calls and messages, but this should not reinforce the addictive behavior of the therapist, but rather be a reinforcement of the therapy and the therapist’s long-term goals.

As we have seen, being a psychologist is complex, both inside and outside the consulting room. Knowing how to set limits is more necessary than in any other professional or life situation. Therapy for psychologists should be fully implemented in our profession to help us support people without forgetting us.

Our thoughts

A high percentage of treatment success is due to the good therapeutic alliance or the good relationship between the therapist and the patient.