If You Look Up From Your Navel, You Will See That You Are Not At The Center Of The Universe

We all know these types of people who think they are the only inhabitants of the world. Whatever happens, these people are going through things that are worse than you, have suffered more, and have more difficult lives. It is to them that we want to say today: if you lift your eyes from your navel, you will see that you are not at the center of the universe.

They lack emotional balance, are parasites on others and use punishment as the only weapon of seduction. They don’t have just one face, but disguise themselves with the one that suits them to succeed in being at the center of the world.

They are children who try to attract attention and for that they do not hesitate to use the feelings of others. They use the extremes of other people’s emotions to supplant their pain, in subterfuge behind made-up stories.

These stories, which are often exaggerations of a reality they may have known, but which then went through the prism of their navel, often have nothing to do with the original stories. With these stories, they try to win over others by appealing to the pain they can cause.

The “me I” or the art of looking only at one’s own navel

The “me I” or the art of looking only at your own navel consists of spending your life talking about yourself. Yes, this “me I” characterized by the “and me is worse”, the “I do not know that to me worse things happen” or “I am the most unlucky person in the world”.

These people complain that they are not listened to, that no one understands them, but it is they who stop listening to themselves to talk about their sorrows. Often this behavior is unconscious because it is the only way they do not feel alone.

In these cases, it is people with low self-esteem who cannot communicate their feelings properly. In addition, they often lack the social skills that allow them to communicate better and above all, to understand the other and to put themselves in their shoes.

In other cases, the art of navel gazing is done in a completely deliberate way. The lack of empathy is then shown in broad daylight. They are selfish and harmful people. And it is through this selfishness that they transform themselves into emotional manipulators.

Characteristics of emotional egoists

Those emotional manipulators who are selfish consciously try to get something from others by appealing to grief . They have the following identifiable characteristics:

• Permanent dissatisfaction: the life they live does not please them and they invent a parallel. With this reality, they try to get the attention of those around them by telling dramatic stories.
• They find pleasure in lamentation: they tend to find pleasure in complaining, because in this way they better assume their role of “poor victim” and succeed in attracting the attention of others. But this only happens at the beginning because over time they tend to find themselves alone. As they say, the little attracts, but the much exhausts.
• Emotional blackmail: because if you really love someone, you don’t let them suffer alone. As easy as that. And it is their credo to demand attention through punishment and blackmail. It is simply a matter of making the other believe that they are a bad person if they do not obey the requests.
• Profound egocentrism: derived from lack of empathy. These people deduce that they deserve more than others and when it doesn’t, they complain. When we don’t listen to them and give them what they deserve, they complain. Ultimately, they are important and the rest is there to serve them.

How to face (and not confront) these people?

It is very difficult to deal with this type of people and to avoid blackmail and confrontation. Cohabiting quietly with these emotional manipulators is complicated because they drain all your resources and make you feel guilty. 

The first thing you need to know is that their complaints or stories are helpful in getting what they want. In the beginning, the complaint may be for a reasonable reason such as a loss or a very negative experience.

At that point, the person complains and finds support from those around him. She shows that she is a victim (who is in pain) and she is surely given more attention. This attention replaces the emotional deficiencies that she suffers. Complaint and selfishness then become a way of communicating.

This is why it is a skill that can be corrected like any other learning. But it takes real questioning and admission on the part of the selfish person who talks only about his feelings and who makes up stories to get the attention of others.

What you can do, as a connoisseur and victim of this selfish person, is try to make her aware of her problem so that she, if she wants to, can ask for help. To do this, use communication strategies like “the sandwich technique”.

Thus, you will be able to express your discomfort and not allow this emotional vampire to absorb you in his circle of selfishness. Because, even if you want to tell him to lift his nose from his navel, so that he sees that he is not at the center of the universe, it is not the best method. If you want to be treated well, treat whoever is in front of you well.